Ok so after the complete physical I had too many things wrong with me to continue the trial....so I was booted out.
I went and talked to my doctor; he said, "Good!" and refereed me to an Ortho doctor. We'll see how that goes. I need to go see my neurologist! Sometimes it feels like I can't feel my left leg at all....and then sometimes it's like it hurts in the weirdest places. It truly gets tiring!
Tonight the nerves in my legs are really jumpy...this stuff is a trip.... my legs just move for no reasons. I can take a pill to calm them but, the pills are hard on your liver and kidney; I am so not trying to trash them. I don't like taking the pills! They make me feel all woozy and I don't like that feeling anymore; so, I only take them when nothing else works. Like, if I can't go to sleep anytime soon .... I will take a pill!
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Monday, August 22, 2011
Clinical Trial
Ok so I am going to be a guinea pig for the doctor. I am going to be part of a study on pain. Hmmmm we'll see how that goes. It is a Lotus Trial. I went to the first appointment last week it was a full physical I'll say.... EKG, blood work. poke this and that; well at least I know that everything else is healthy....lol My next appointment is on this coming Friday; more then.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
A little about me and my blog
This blog is to talk about my physical pain as well as my recovery from drugs and alcohol. I have to talk about it here because I can't share it in the meetings. (or I should say "I" don't want to...) I don't want any one to go out because I can do ....what I can do ..... or am doing.
No one knows but my children, because they are here with me. (watching my every move) which is fine with me. Shoot that way I get a little help!.......(But don't get me wrong ......... I stay in touch with my friends and family in recovery.)
I have had problems with pain through out my teen years (never being diagnost or given a reason), then multiple car accidents; and finally after multiple hospital visits and ambulance rides and many test; I was told that I have Spinal Arthritis as well as arthritis in my two hips and left knee(2010). In 2009 I was told that I had it in my hands and fingers. ( I figured that was cracking my knuckles all the time) So I have been fighting this pain thing for a long time. As the different years have passed different stages have shown themselves.
June 2006 was the scariest! My body couldn't even hold itself; I couldn't stand at all. My body had just collapsed, so once again to the hospital I go. I have been back to the hospital many times since then.
In 2010.... Epidural injections and Soma pills.....that's when I really got scared.
I have been always carefully not to take to many pills....I don't want to get hooked.....and I don't like the way they make me feel....some have had made me throw up. I have tried many types of "alternative medicine" in the past; to no avail....(Alot of stuff I have not and will not try..... I google.com everything)
I have tried Sleepy Time tea, St. John's Wort and various ointments. (That's were the record scratches at the meetings)..... some would say that I am in relapse mode...... I do not beleive so! I have not and will not drink or drug ever again....I keep my addiction in check. I love who, what, when, where and why I am! I have an addictive personality and I know that; it is a fact of life for me. I have accepted that fact. I must always pay attention to my thought process and my intentions. I do not use pills on a daily basis (and that is not me trying to justify anything - it is me telling you that I do have to take pills on some days) ..... I only use them when nothing else is working.
My last hospital trip was about 3-4 months ago. .... taken out of my house via amblance I was given a shot of percacet and morphine.....now that was a combination.... That is what I am totally afraid off.....no buddy...I refuse to .... hmmmm just re-thinking about it I need to redirect me. Really tho'!
So this blog is a way of me telling the world and those I love and respect of my recovery and what is really going on with me; adding to my recovery by getting things off my chest through blogging.
To those who judge ... I don't care ... your thoughts are your thoughts ... my pain is my pain ... and my recovery is just that ..... My Recovery!
Find your own brand of recovery ........ I am finding mine.
No one knows but my children, because they are here with me. (watching my every move) which is fine with me. Shoot that way I get a little help!.......(But don't get me wrong ......... I stay in touch with my friends and family in recovery.)
I have had problems with pain through out my teen years (never being diagnost or given a reason), then multiple car accidents; and finally after multiple hospital visits and ambulance rides and many test; I was told that I have Spinal Arthritis as well as arthritis in my two hips and left knee(2010). In 2009 I was told that I had it in my hands and fingers. ( I figured that was cracking my knuckles all the time) So I have been fighting this pain thing for a long time. As the different years have passed different stages have shown themselves.
June 2006 was the scariest! My body couldn't even hold itself; I couldn't stand at all. My body had just collapsed, so once again to the hospital I go. I have been back to the hospital many times since then.
In 2010.... Epidural injections and Soma pills.....that's when I really got scared.
I have been always carefully not to take to many pills....I don't want to get hooked.....and I don't like the way they make me feel....some have had made me throw up. I have tried many types of "alternative medicine" in the past; to no avail....(Alot of stuff I have not and will not try..... I google.com everything)
I have tried Sleepy Time tea, St. John's Wort and various ointments. (That's were the record scratches at the meetings)..... some would say that I am in relapse mode...... I do not beleive so! I have not and will not drink or drug ever again....I keep my addiction in check. I love who, what, when, where and why I am! I have an addictive personality and I know that; it is a fact of life for me. I have accepted that fact. I must always pay attention to my thought process and my intentions. I do not use pills on a daily basis (and that is not me trying to justify anything - it is me telling you that I do have to take pills on some days) ..... I only use them when nothing else is working.
My last hospital trip was about 3-4 months ago. .... taken out of my house via amblance I was given a shot of percacet and morphine.....now that was a combination.... That is what I am totally afraid off.....no buddy...I refuse to .... hmmmm just re-thinking about it I need to redirect me. Really tho'!
So this blog is a way of me telling the world and those I love and respect of my recovery and what is really going on with me; adding to my recovery by getting things off my chest through blogging.
To those who judge ... I don't care ... your thoughts are your thoughts ... my pain is my pain ... and my recovery is just that ..... My Recovery!
Find your own brand of recovery ........ I am finding mine.
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